Awareness . . . The First Step to Change

As a therapist, I am a firm believer that awareness is the first step to change. As I oftentimes tell clients, we do not learn by luck or being struck by lightening. We do however learn through experience and observation. I'm not speaking of casual experiences and haphazard observations, but the gritty, get-your-hands-dirty, dig-down deep, here-and-now, present-centered, moment-by-moment kind.


Unfortunately, we tend to go about our daily lives treating our experiences with a bit of disregard and our relationships with significant others for granted. Quite frankly, we lose sight of the bigger picture and what we still have in our lives as well as the little things that make our experiences richer, more vibrant, and more alive. We tend to neglect being fully present in our daily tasks, responsibilities, and interactions with others. We tend to fret over things in the past including past mistakes and regrets and old past wounds. Additionally, we tend to live too far in the future, anticipating preconceived disappointments and our worlds falling apart. When we live in the past or present, it is impossible to appreciate this very moment in time.


However, when we become more aware, we can appreciate the nuts and bolts of daily life and are better equipped to find value in such experiences. It helps us to get more in touch and in tune with ourselves as well as more in touch and in tune with those around us. It helps us to discover greater meaning, purpose, and direction in our lives. It helps us to appreciate others and value our relationships with them, even when they are not "perfect." For example, when is the last time you really stopped to smell the roses? Not just figuratively, but literally. Try it and you'll see what I mean. Really study the color, texture, and wonderful smell the rose embodies and evokes. Your thoughts will slow down, your worries will melt away, your heart will begin to beat more slowly, your blood pressure will lower, your muscles will begin to relax, and you will begin to appreciate THAT very moment you just experienced, even when there are still stressors and conflict in your life. As insignificant as that may sound, trust me, just try it. Seize that moment, take that opportunity, and appreciate everything about the experience. And if you prick your finger on a thorn, find the value in it as well and don't worry or fret about it. Don't discount the positive moment you just experienced. YOU are the one smelling the rose while everyone else around you is rushing about their day mindlessly (i.e., without any awareness other than the rush and crazy stress-inducing effect of life's demands). And, without awareness, you essentially willingly neglect what you can learn and grow from in those here-and-now experiences, both good and bad.


So the lesson here is simple in concept, but can be certainly challenging to implement. However, even if you are aware 50% more in your life, that is better than being completely going about life mindlessly and haphazardly. Again, awareness is the first step to change and is indeed an opportunity to grow and change. Get in better touch with yourself, your experiences, and those around you. Check out your attitude and perceptions about yourself, others, and the world around you. Stop just existing and going through the motions and begin to really live your life in this very moment. And go beyond this to do the same in your roles, responsibilities, and relationships you may have previously neglected, been frustrated with, and / or taken for granted.So stop and smell the roses and seize the little moments in life when they present themselves to you. You'll appreciate the fact that you did.